“Motivation is a major problem and one of the factors for people failing to meet their goals in life. So what do you do to get motivated?”
I saw this question, with ensuing discussion, in a social media forum that I knew quite well (Ecademy, now defunct)
Other participants didn’t find it at all strange. They each had their own recipes. One listens to a little voice behind her left eyebrow. It’s her Mum’s voice, and it tells her to get started and persevere. Another is an “inveterate list maker which helps enormously . . .”. Another, referring to a speaker who advocates setting yourself MASSIVE GOALS (her capitals), has been training in sports massage and is now aiming at a role in the 2012 Olympics.
Why do people find it necessary to punish themselves? Why set yourself a goal at all, let alone one which does not intrinsically motivate you?
Why pursue goals, rather than happiness? “Ah,” comes the response. “You’ll be happy when you have achieved them!”
Firstly that’s not true. Secondly, do you value happiness so little as to postpone it so long? Thirdly, are you so foolish as to imagine that there is no other way to happiness than through achievements?
Commonplace ideas gain credibility merely through popularity, merely through repetition. This is nothing new. In previous centuries, other ideas held sway, for example “Don’t have ideas above your station in life.” Or,
The rich man in his castle
the poor man at his gate
God made them high or lowly
and ordered their estate
from All things bright and beautiful, by Mrs Alexander, 1848. This verse is now censored out from hymn books. Such ideas were hard to resist, because they were reflected in the way society was organised.
Can we really free ourselves from goals and motivation? Suppose my goal is to be a best-selling author, or perhaps a posthumously famous author. If I don’t actually enjoy each day’s writing, what am I doing but punishing myself? Let us not be confused by the example of many tortured artists who had a love-hate relationship with their craft and had to force themselves. The love was much greater than the hate. It was vocation. They were called and if they had ignored that call they might as well have been dead.
“Don’t you motivate yourself? How do you stir yourself into necessary action?” I hear you ask.
Well, it’s through sensitivity alone. The world impinges upon me and arouses in me some nagging emotion, that will not be silenced until I do something. So I find out what action I have to do to stop the emotion (which is my own authentic voice, not the internalised voice of my mother, wife or guru). Happiness now is my spur, nothing else. My compassion comes from the bad feeling I get if I harden my heart. It has little to do with principles, though like everyone I have those too.
I’m against goals altogether. Let’s do today right, in all its details, according to our sensitivity and conscience, rather than suppress our feelings to follow some abstraction.
a wayfarer’s notes 
you know I've read this many times. but i keep hoping someone else will comment before me. LOL
I somewhat understand your view on the punishment side of goals.
maybe thats what Buddha meant when he said, “It is better to travel well than to arrive”.
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Thanks for this Kathy. Is it Buddha who was alleged to have said that? Buddha as represented in the religion which bears his name is the ultimate goal-setter and so I question his every word, but your quote softens it a bit.
In commenting, you are the opposite of me. I like to be the first, and if too many comments already, I rarely bother!
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i think it starts in school. Teachers teach the kids goals. this goal thing is still along in adult years. Most people don't have it in them to do it right today as you said. So they follow thier eyebrows or mums or gurus. interesting.
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I like this post! 🙂
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the goal-setting thing is purely calvinist consumerism…..but here we are deep within the belly of the beast.
what if you were asked to give up your dreams of being a best selling author so that you may travel well?
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Thanks Alistair, I feel you are quite right.
I have given up those dreams of being a best-selling author! And over the weekend I abandoned also my dreams of being a successful therapist. And of course I don't want to be an unsuccessful one – unfair on the poor clients!
Travelling well, yes that is the thing! Don't you sometimes think there are more people claiming to help others be happy than those who are actually happy?
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My first visit to your blog. The most important thing is to enjoy the process without bothering about the end result. When you start thinking about end result, you become tense and lose the present moment. Those who live naturally, don't need to set any goals.
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Thanks, Anando, I think I know what you mean, partially. But when you say “those who live naturally” do you mean those who live outside of modern Western-style society?
When we earn our living in an office say, or even as a postman, end results have to be thought of. Yesterday the postman delivered letters to me which should have gone to a different house. Made my think some of my letters might also go astray.
Even an old-style farmer needs to consider end-result in order to prevent catastrophe in his work with nature.
So I am wondering if your comments are not too idealistic for most people's everyday life. I don't want to have a gulf between the ideal and the practical.
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Living naturally doesn't mean living outside modern Western-style society. You can do all sorts of things and remain natural. Many of the Indian masters didn't renounce the world even after enlightenment.
“When we earn our living in an office say, or even as a postman, end results have to be thought of. Yesterday the postman delivered letters to me which should have gone to a different house.”
Are you sure he was not concerned about the end result? I think he was, still he made a mistake. May be, he was not enjoying the process of delivering letters.
The happiest people are those who enjoy the process. You can see them all around you. Just need to look little closely.
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For example, I enjoy playing cricket and don't think about the end result. I feel happy when I am playing the game, but my captain doesn't feel so when I play. He is too concerened about the end result.
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Well, Anando, I am very sympathetic to your position. Especially if you get sacked from the side by your captain!
As for the postman, I have complained to the post office before this. I believe it happens only when the regular postman is on leave. I think you are right, his substitute is not enjoying the process of delivering letters!
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